I just quit a job I hated but I don’t know what’s next. How do I find a job I like?

Dear Grace,

I have been dealing with a dilemma about my career. I have a Bachelors of Science in biology but I have no idea what to do with it. My family tells me I should go back to the medical field but I guess you can say I am traumatized from the life I have lived after high school. I was a certified nursing assistant then became a caregiver for a few years for my grandparents. I recently resigned from my job as a laboratory technician due to being lonely and generally hating my job.

I am at a fork in the road and need help in understanding what I want in my career now that I have free time to figure out who I am. I don’t want to be a complainer or feel that I have wasted my life. I know I am still young but self-doubt has been a negative in my life. I guess I just need advice for my mental clarity.

– Self-Doubting in the Suburbs

Dear Self-Doubting,

First of all, it’s not complaining to state a fact. Starting a career is hard. Changing careers is hard. Figuring out what you want to do with your life is (you guessed it) hard! I really admire the courage it took to recognize that you’re not happy with what you’ve been doing and make a change. Good for you!

Now that you have some time to figure out who you are and what you want, here are some things to consider.

Knowing what you don’t want is as valuable as knowing what you do.

I know from experience how frustrating it can be to feel like you’ve wasted time in jobs that weren’t the right fit. And I get feeling stalled out, but I’d suggest that learning what you don’t want to do isn’t a waste at all. You’ve now got real experience to help you narrow your search for careers in the future. After reading your question, it sounds like you’re looking for a job with less repetition and some emotional distance; the mundane routine of a lab and the emotional labor of caregiving weren’t good for your mental health. That’s SO useful to know! Try making a list of other specific things you liked and disliked about each job. It will help you know which jobs to avoid and which to explore, plus it gives you selling points when meeting with recruiters. You might say, “I like a job that’s a little unpredictable every day,” or “I like to work with a team.”

Zero in on people you admire.

Now that you know a little more about what you’re looking for, connecting with people who are doing something you find interesting can help bring the details into clarity. If, for instance, there is a vet tech at your pet’s clinic that you get along with, or a neighbor with an interesting job, consider calling them up and asking about their experience—what do they like and dislike about their work? How did they get into their current job? What advice would they give to someone interested in the field? While you don’t have to stay firmly in the medical field, you might be surprised by how many options there are for someone with your education and background. Talking to real people and hearing their advice is a great way to get a feel for which path could be right for you.

Life isn’t a straight line

I know I say this a lot—but that’s only because it’s true. There are ebbs and flows in all parts of life, including our career paths. Don’t let pressure from your family or watching your friends’ milestones freak you out or make you feel like you’re failing. I know they just want to see you happy and successful, but ultimately, it’s your life and you get to decide what success looks like. You also deserve the opportunity to discover what makes you happy and take whatever route you want to get there.

Remember: Your biology degree isn’t your only asset. You’ve learned plenty of skills along the way and you might be surprised by how many other fields or jobs you’re suited for. My final piece of advice is to throw your hat in the ring, even if you may not feel like the most natural fit. Studies show that, when it comes to career opportunities, one of the things that holds women back is our own self-doubt (all that self-talk about not being qualified, experienced, or educated enough). So don’t let your fear of trying something new keep you from pursuing an opportunity that feels interesting or exciting. You owe it to yourself to reach for what you want!

Sending you all my best wishes for your next adventure!

Grace