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How do I change my attitude about 2024?

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Dear Grace, 

I always hate the time after New Year’s because of the pressure to suddenly reinvent myself, diet, and just change my whole life. Last year was a particularly hard year for me and I feel even more pessimistic than usual this January. How do I get out of this New Year’s rut?

– Debbie Downer in Denver


Dear Debbie Downer,

I hear you loud and clear. I agree that the pressure around the new year to suddenly “fix” ourselves and our lives usually ends up being a source of pain and shame, rather than a boost to our wellbeing. But before we go any further, Debbie, I want to remind you that you aren’t a project that needs “fixing.” You are worthy of love and grace just as you are, don’t let the resolution-rush convince you otherwise. 

That being said, it’s true that the start of a new year (a new week, or even a new day) is a chance to make choices that make our lives fuller, healthier, and happier. 

The internet is full of advice for how to start your new year off strong (and some of it is not half bad), like making a vision board, journaling about your goals, and reflecting on what the past year has taught you. But instead of quoting what’s already been said, I’m turning the mic over to your fellow readers to share what they’re bringing with them into 2024. 

Let’s pause and look back at some lessons we learned in 2023:

The past year has taught me that patience is really a virtue. I’ve learned how by showing compassion, love and kindness to others can really change a person’s perspective about their life and how they view the world.”

One thing I learned is to finish what you start. I cleaned out my house this year and too many boxes of projects and supplies went off to the thrift shop. This year I’m going to be realistic about what I can get done, I’m not superwoman!”

This past year has taught me that it takes a village to thrive, and that it’s more than ok to need your village! It has shown me I’m stronger than I give myself credit for, That I am every bit of the survivor that looks back at me!!!”

I’ve learned that I need to think about myself instead of everyone else. I tend to put my happiness on the back burner and do for others.” 

I have learned that I am more capable than I’ve given myself credit for being in the past.

I have learned that no matter how much you want something to work out, sometimes you have to move on and let the negativity in the past and move on to a brighter, safer, happier, future. I have learned that I matter too.

After these (and many more) incredible takeaways from last year, we’ve made a list of what we’re saying YES and NO to in 2024. We’ve got twelve months—not all of this will happen in January! 

We’re saying YES to…

  • Taking care of myself and my own needs
  • Simple pleasures
  • Making a budget and saving money
  • Getting sober and sticking with it
  • More creative time and coffee dates with friends
  • Making a change in my career

We’re saying NO to…

  • Stressing out at work
  • Dieting and fretting over losing weight
  • Bottling my feelings up instead of speaking up
  • Overextending myself for others and neglecting myself
  • Being afraid to do things and take risks
  • Gossip and negativity

Everyone is different, Debbie Downer, but I hope hearing from fellow readers helped you point your attitude in a positive direction and figure out what you want this year to look and feel like. Wherever it takes you, I’m wishing you a bold, healthy, and joyful 2024. 

Your friend, 

Grace