How to Help a Stranger
Reading Time: 3 minutes
Share:
Earlier this month I shared my advice for a woman who stood up for someone who was being mistreated in the grocery store. It’s not always easy or comfortable to stand up to bullying, but the right thing to do isn’t always the easy or comfortable thing.
At the end of the column, I asked readers what they would have done in the same situation:

Almost everyone who responded (over 88%!) said they would “speak up, like she did.” It reminded me just how special this community is—women from all over the country, who do the right thing even when it’s hard.
I also asked our readers to tell me about a time that they stood up for someone who was being treated unfairly. Here are some of my favorite responses:
- “How ironic, I had the same situation happen in a supermarket! The customer didn’t speak English well and the clerk was talking louder and louder to get him to understand until the clerk was basically screaming. I intervened saying this customer can hear you, he just can’t speak English. It was obviously settled and the customer just kept on thanking me in whatever language he was speaking.”
- “In my town, there is an elderly man who sits in McDonald’s every day. Maybe he has nowhere else to go? The manager allows the man to sit there all day. I saw he was being badgered by a young man customer. I praised the manager for allowing this lonely person to stay and told young man to stop verbally attacking him.”
- “There’s an old gentleman in my neighborhood one of the nicest men I’ve ever met in my entire life! He was at the local gas station in front of me and the sales clerk was getting annoyed with him because he was slow! I stood up for that old man and told her that she was absolutely wrong with what she was doing! We can’t get angry at elderly or disabled people for moving slowly.”
- “I work at a hotel, cooking. The General Manager didn’t want a new mother to breastfeed in the restaurant (even though she was covered up and my last customer). I told him it was wrong to tell her she couldn’t. My boss said “Heck no.” I held my ground and told him it wasn’t okay.”
- “When I was at Walmart and the person working was being rude to a customer because he was overweight. She said “the fat people’s clothes are over there” and I had to say something. So I said “Ma’am, that was rude. You could have told him the big and tall section was in a different area.” It’s not okay to be unkind.”
- “Today someone used unkind (racist) words to an older gentleman. I spoke up to say “That is not a polite or kind way to speak to another person.” She apologized but feelings were hurt anyway. She shouldn’t have said that to begin with.”
These and so many other stories of standing up for someone who is being harassed have warmed my heart. If you are in the minority of women who aren’t sure if they have the courage to speak up, I hope you can take inspiration from these stories. Know that even when it seems lonely or scary to speak up for what’s right, there is a whole community of women standing with you. You are not alone!
Share in the comments how you feel when someone stands up for you!
I always say something, especially if there are a lot of people around
There is one thing I can’t stand is a Bully. If you want to see my temper let me see someone bullying someone or a animal. I’m an Easy going person who laughs a lot very seldom gets upset but this burns my a**. I’ve had it tried on me before and let me just say I don’t think they will ever do that again. I never raised my voice nor cussed but when I git finished with this person she was nearly in tears. Then I told her God doesn’t like Ugly and I’m not talking about your face.
Very inspiring, I am with you all!! The one who smiles first WINS😁just remember that when your out in public. Another one , SMILE it makes people wonder what your up too!!! We are Women who can stand up against the negative people, my hat says B-KIND, has a bee 🐝 Kind , lol , People need to know that someone has there back when other people are being a bully. I would stand up and say” WWJD?? What would Jesus do?? He would stand up against the bully and then tell them a riddle about themselfs. He would also pray for there soul❤️🤍💙🇺🇸💪🏼💯☦️
I love these powerful testimonies. For, I myself, stood up for something that was right. Two cousins got into an altercation. One had a gun and the other didn’t. But had I not intervene, this altercation could have not only ended with a life being lost, but also with the other person spending the rest of their life in prison. But because of me stepping in, the problem was solved, and I was thanked by the two because they knew that I meant no harm, but intervened because I cared. If we don’t stand for something. We’ll fall for anything. Thank you for allowing me to share my story.
She I would step up because I can’t stand someone to bully someone else it’s wrong and yes I will make a seen I would tell who’s ever in control there would know what you done
Me myself got bullied at a groceries store , I was getting my change out of my handbag and the cashier was telling me to hurry cuz the line is getting longer, I was trying my best for I had my hand bandaged up from a hot water burn , the cashier started raising her voice louder and louder and then I dropped all my change on the floor, and I started to cry , too people in line came over and was helping me pick up my change and one lady started telling the cashier to stop bulling me . The Manager came over and told the employer to apologize to me , and she needed to sign up for a class . About bulling that the store had made it mandatory for all employers to take , the lady apologized , and I payed for my food and left , If it wasn’t for the other people who stood up for me , I think I would of never went back into that store,
I was bullied as a teenager and I made bad decisions due to the bullying I know now. I can’t remember the last bully situation but I definitely don’t tolerate it.
A lot of jealousy instead of watering their own grass. It can play a role in your child life
I’m 87 years old, this age is a struggle every day because you’re struggling because you can’t do things that you used to do. So I find the things I can’t do I put that behind me and I think positive I can do the rest. I live alone in the country and every day is a challenge and if I get a smile for somebody, it makes me feel better. Everyone’s gonna get here. Just remember that.
Being rude and disrespectful seems to be the norm so I try to compliment people. Look at you looking fabulous. If someone’s struggling to walk I say look at you up and going wanna race? As I use a walker and am very slow. That usually sparks a flame of hope and accomplishment. Most of all a smile
She did the right thing! Bullying is nothing to stand around and witness
I will always stand up against bullies, all the above comments are spot on.
Recently, outside of a WAWA,, I seen and heard a guy yelling at someone
(ex-girlfriend) I assumed. Wisely she drove away, but this man was still raging. He then walked up to a man sitting in a truck by the gas pump right in back of the one I was pumping gas into my car. This young man was still yelling while pumping gas into the older man’s car. The older man remained silent. I could not ignore this at all, so I prayed for wisdom. All of the sudden I walked up to the young man and calmly and politely I asked him his name. After he told me his name I asked if he would mind if I put my hand on his shoulder and pray. Thankfully he agreed to let me, I prayed out loud for God to give him peace, letting him know that other onlookers only seen his anger, but
God allowed me to see his pain and the loneliness of a broken heart. I felt this man’s body relax as the stress of the situation left him. I know I did this through God’s strength, not my own.
But when I witnessed the peace on this man’s face as we parted ways, my heart was filled with abundant joy.
Sometimes we only see the victim, but that day my eyes were open to the heart of the offender.
I don’t think this goes under bullying, but I snapped on a group of men that were at a thriftshop. The employees bring out carts with new items and the rule is you can’t go through anything until their done and give the ok. These guys literally went through the bins like idiots, breaking glasses and anything in their way. Nobody said anything until I spoke up and told them how rude they were and to have some consideration for others that may would have bought an item if it wasn’t smashed right in front of them! Speak up!! Perks! Them..not you!
Great job, someone needs to stand up for others that either won’t, or are to afraid to. Bullying is wrong in every situation.
Anti bullying is my middle name. I discourage anti-Semitic and anti-immigrants comments and rude treatment everywhere I go and see this behavior.
I would have and have done so. I do not tolerate people who dont show compation. We are here to love one another no matter what. I would have scanned my card if she didn’t have one. I would also tell the cashier that we are set forth on earth to show mercy and love for one another and god gives you chances to show that love and what you might do when giving the oppertunity.
I am interested in reading the story from Grace. Thank you for your support.
I would also ask the bully why do they feel they have to make someone else feel bad.
Next I was ask them can I pray for them.
Wen we first got to AZ I was across the street an I saw this old man he was kneeling down in the snow , an he looked like he needed help, so I ran across the street an I asked him if he needed help he said yes plz so I helped him get up an I helped him to his car. Then my hb was like where’d u go ? Then I told him tht I went across the street to help an old man who was kneeling in the snow. No bully story here but I just thought I’d share this cuz it just made me feel so good to help someone else!!
O.k. If I see someone having a hard time. Our not getting respect. Being talked down to. This is where I come in ,in a heart beat. I was treated very badly my whole life. I am 77. Now. No one. I mean no one will ever talk horrible to another person ,if I am around or with in ear shot. I will. Tactfully make my voice heard. Tell the Bully ,It’s done it’s over. Move along. The days we are in, Calls for strong 💪 voices and at the same time. Comfort for a victim and true guilt placed on the abusive one. I am all for Respect and Honor.
If I witness anyone mistreating others while I’m in public.. YES! I would definitely say something weather or not it’s my place or not..I don’t tolerate that behavior.. Smh.. people’s these days..
Unfortunately, I feel like most people are going to say that they would stand up for another person when in reality they don’t or won’t say anything at all. It’s easy to sit behind a keyboard or on a phone and go with the “popular” opinion. I challenge everyone who said they would to ACTUALLY DO IT. From my experience most women don’t stand up for others, even more so if their well known in a community. They worry about what other people would say or think of them or they just feel flat out intimidated. At the same time they think it’s non of their business or that the person getting bullied needs to grow a pair and learn to stand up for themselves. I personally have had to stand up to people because people seem to just let that kind of thing happen.
I love this forum. It shows there are still people who care for others. It does my heart good to read the kindness they show for the people who can’t defend themselves . God is goid
When you bullied stand up to the bullie if your afraud to ask someone for help who knows hiw to deal with it
I was at McDonald’s when an irate woman pushes past everyone in line to start reaming the young man working because he forgot her sauce for her nuggets. She was calling him names and being ridiculous. I told her “Wow if THAT is the WORST thing that happens to you today, you’re having a pretty good day!”
The lady behind me agreed and loudly added,”Exactly! I WISH missing sauce was ALL I had to be upset about! If it was, I certainly wouldn’t attack a young man working the counter by himself, obviously doing the best he can.” Then all of us in line complimented the young man on what a great job he was doing on a day they were obviously short-handed. The rude lady was embarrassed but quietly told us we should mind our own business as she walked out with her head hung low.
Remember folks- Don’t sweat the small stuff! Guess What? It’s ALL SMALL STUFF 😉
I am new to this site and I just love it so much! Whomever owns this site is brilliant. Great job for bringing people together in a positive way.
I wouldn’t be able to stand for anyone being unkind to an elderly person. I love their sweet and kind hearts. That is someone’s mother or grandmother and my own mom and grandma are so near and dear to me.
I agree with all the comments, standing up for the person who can’t do it for themselves has always been my way of doing things even if sometimes it might hurt me are maybe even stand alone
I always do the right thing no matter the repercussions that may come. The “angry” ppl aren’t really angry, they’re hurting and they need love & compassion too. We as a whole have forgotten to love your fellow man for whatever reason & that makes me sad. Kudos to all of the women here who remember to love and who have compassion!
I thought I commented but can’t find it.
Anyway folks thanks for being here and sharing about real ass stuff. Aaaand showing that so much more is possible when we work together. Yeah folks that give a Shiiiiiiit! Practicing kindness is a super positive energy maker! Give that gift to both another person, but also ourselves! Because if everyone practiced a little more kindness and alot less judging of others( who’s past or present you know nothing about) I Capital T Truly believe we would be a much more peaceful planet! Sending Positive energy’s and vibes to anyone reading!! 🤗😇
I was in line at a store, an elderly woman was fussing with her wallet to count out exact change the people behind me were getting edgy. The older woman looked at me and apologized for taking so long, I loudly said,”as long as you take breath, you have the right to take up space, you are fine take your time, I get it.”
The cashier yelled , thank you, yes!
The women behind me started to act unacceptable, so I glared at them and said , she has rights. Knock it off. They all finally settled down in agreement. Sometimes just looking or speaking like a drill Sgt. works younger people forget that the older generations out there understood counting Pennie’s during the depression, we all could learn to just be patient we do not know what makes another person do the things they do. But to not be patient is a sign of disconnect to the world.
I love this platform! I would love to give all the positive vibes like usual!
I often try to help the elderly people in our community especially at the grocery store because they often have trouble with seeing the date food expiring
I’m a little late with a response, I would definitely stand up if I saw someone being bullied anywhere anytime. Even if I had to make a scene I’d put the bully in their place.
Thank you for the kind stories you share. The thoughtfulness you spread through your post. I know there’s so much kindness in this world that isn’t shown off. Stand up to bully’s is a start and we have to keep it going!! When something gets likes, clicks and shares it spreads fast. So let’s like, share and click on kindness. Happiness to all within who gives out kindness.. Peace is needed more!
Yes to standing up for bullying! If you can explain yourself you should express yourself.
I don’t know what made me read this or find this community, but I love what you stand for. I’m actually involved with another anti-bullying community and we actually film movies!
Long ago in the Boston subway, a young women with a small child was being harassed by two guys so I said to her, “hey follow my lead.” I said “oh honey I’m so glad I bumped into you, your Uncle and I wanted you to come to dinner.” Those creepy guys left!
Bullying is never ok never allow yourself or anyone else to be bullied if u see someone being bullied please step in and say something because bullying is so wrong and not ok
I love the that she took the initiative to stand up for that person! We also have to remember to be safe out there because we living a world that is full of a lot of angry people for whatever reason I don’t know. So just be safe with whatever you do when you stand up to bullies.
Definitely standing up to bullying is the right thing to do!! No one likes to be bullied.